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Discussion in ' Nevermore ' started by TeeJun 23, This site is supported by the advertisements on it, please disable your AdBlocker so we can continue to provide you with the quality content you expect. I Wait For You the forum today! Up. El Stormo Member. Race mankind must die.

RaceJun 23, Mike Member. FretsAflame Undercover Shredder. It is divided into two parts for easier comprehension. The highlight of the early part of the night was when I drunk-dialed one of the MTV producers, Serena [this was about a week before MTV was set to do a documentary about me]. She had made the mistake of giving me her personal cell phone and telling me to call her "anytime you have any questions or anything. You give me an inch, I'm going to take the whole yard stick. Are you going to follow me to Walgreen's to get some Ru? What are you wearing? And more importantly, she is not even close to I was drinking at an alarming rate and was well on my way to breaking things and fornicating with hot girls, when some guy came up to me and said, "Aren't you Tucker Max?

I am not a big enough celebrity yet to be used to this, so of course I ignored everything else and basked in the glow of adulation as he introduced me to all his friends. Of course, that glow of adulation might have been the five tequila shots I had done in the past hour. I can't remember what he and I talked about, but I'm sure it was exclusively about me and how awesome I am. The funniest part shemale forum when he was ready for the next round, asked if I wanted another one, then looked at my unfinished beer, and said, rather condescendingly "Oh.

You're not finished. I deserved it, and I would expect nothing less. Hey, if I can't take a joke, then fuck me. Anyway, we were talking, about me of course, when this girl came up and basically wrapped herself around me and started almost making out with me. I chatted with her for about 20 minutes, when she said, "Let's go back to your place. I like my fans, shemale forum I am not passing up pussy for them, even though I am pretty sure that guy said to me as I was leaving, "Tucker, what are you doing?

She's a high 2-star at best. Then came perhaps the greatest cock block I have ever seen. As we were leaving, her friends, seemingly on cue, descended on her from all different directions of the bar. I never even saw them coming.

They herded her away from me and into a cab, then piled in after her. The last one turned to me and said, "Sorry, no more room in the cab. I stood out there in the cold for awhile, staring at the taxi as it drove off down the street, before I eventually just went back inside and wandered around the bar like a lost vagrant. My mind was having trouble shifting back into "Pursue" mode after being in "Gonna get laid" mode.

It was then that my cell phone rang, and part two of the story began Part 2: Tucker has the most disturbing conversation ever I answered my phone, still in a daze from having eager vagina snatched away from me, and it was none other than Jez, the girl that used to have two vaginas.

Come up and meet shemale forum, we're at Felt. It's on Halsted, right north of Belmont. I take a taxi and arrive to find a bar completely packed with dozens of the best-dressed, hottest guys I have ever seen, and hardly any girls. Oh, that's fucking great Jez, thanks for bringing me up here, how am I supposed to pick up a girl at this fucking sausage-fest Oh no Jez comes running over and gives me a big hug and a kiss.

She is wasted. One of them looks just like Christian Slater! Isn't he so cute!! I tell the bartender to just bring me anything strong. That short-sighted comment is immediately rewarded with a raspberry long island iced tea. I guess I'm gonna get fucked one way or another. Having cut my clubbing teeth in South Beach at clubs like Twist and Swirl, I am used to hanging out around gay guys, and thus am completely comfortable around them, but this was a totally different experience. In South Beach, the coolest clubs are the "gay clubs," but it's usually pretty obvious who is gay and who is not.

The gay guys are flamboyant and entertaining, real thin, drink bright colored drinks, and wear dazzling, shiny clothes. The straight guys wear tight shirts and hang out in packs, waiting for opportunities to hit on the numerous hot girls that go to those clubs "just to dance.

In Chicago, the gay guys look and act just like straight guys, except they accessorize and dress better. And suck dick. I was at the table with a girl and three guys, each of which on first or even second glance looked and acted just like any of my other friends, except my friends don't want to push in my stool. But after I got used to it, I was actually thankful to be hanging out with these great looking guys, all of which are gay, because it just means less competition for me.

Ask any of the 40 or so straight guys who have attended Vassar over the past decade; having lots of gay guys around means the girls will be desperate. Unfortunately, there were no girls around except for the obligatory fag hags, which did not tickle my loins. So being bored, I couldn't resist the temptation to start quizzing these guys. There are shemale forum so many questions. I started off by throwing one out to the table: "Alright guys, seriously, what is it about sucking dick that you like so much?

Women don't have dicks, they don't really know how to deal with them like we do. I guess. I'm just going to have to take their word for it. We leave Felt and decide to go to Manhole. Just by the name, you should be able to discern some things about Manhole. But let me be clear for the stupid readers, like my cousin: Manhole is a famous gay club, and it is famous for a reason, namely, lots of gay "things" shemale forum on there.

On the way there, Adam expresses concern for me, "Tucker are sure you want to go here? This place is very I'm not about to avoid such great story potential just because of some swinging dicks, "Dude, I grew up in South Beach. There is nothing in there that shemale forum shock or disturb me. I wasn't prepared. Let me attempt to describe this place: The club opened into a huge room, shemale forum ended in a tunnel that led to another huge back room.

The front room shemale forum a large, star-shaped bar in the center of it. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV's, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV's were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport. The walls were a dark, dingy brown.

I stayed at least two feet from them at all times. And my favorite part: Every guy had his shirt off. Except me. And it was going to stay that way. Jez and I get in line for the bathroom, and every guy in line immediately pushes her to the front. She asks why, and they say, "Because you actually have to go.

The last one stops, says, "Oh wait, I have to pee," and he back into the bathroom. Jez and I decide to go in the bathroom together. We walk in, and I make her close the door handle, because I don't want to touch it. I have never been more disgusted in my life. The walls, which were originally some shade of orange, were now an oily brown, having been re-painted with splooge stains. Some of the stains were like 10 feet high on the wall. Who was fucking in here, Peter North? I pee in the sink and quickly exit, refusing to touch any surface. We meet up with three other gay guys who are friends with Adam.

One of them, Lloyd, takes Jez and I on a tour of the rest of the club. The back room was the dance area, and it was packed with hundreds of shirtless guys. The room smelled like some horrible combination of Isaac Mizrahi, sweat and gay sex. As Lloyd took us through the throngs of dancing Sodomites, he got into a sort of scuffle with one of them, an obvious flamer instead of the more masculine ones we had been hanging out with.

I'm just going to pause here and let you insert your own joke. She said sure, and I gave them a good slapping. It was awesome. She loved it because she thought I was gay and thus safe, and I loved it because I am straight and she had great tits.

Everybody wins! Jez and I took a spot next to the front bar, and her gay friends immediately surrounded us. The three of them were right up on me, each with their shirts off. They began asking me about the gay porn showing in the TV screens, and whether that offended me or made me uncomfortable.

Porn shemale forum porn; I've seen so much in my life I've become inured to it. Most of the shots are up close, too. You can't even tell if it's a male ass or a female ass getting fucked until they pan out. The first subject was something I knew nothing about, and was actually kind of interested in, in a sort of clinical, sociological kind of way: How do gay guys decide who fucks who?

I mean, when two guys go home, do they flip a coin? Play rock, paper, scissors? How does that work? They explained that there are two types of gay guys: Tops and Bottoms. Tops are the ones that like to do the fucking, the pitchers, if you will, and the bottoms are the ones that like to get fucked, the catchers. Most gay guys have a preference, but can go either way, though there are a certain percentage that are only one way or the other. So if two Strict Bottoms go home together, then no one gets fucked, though there is still the oral sex option.

This really was remarkable info to me. I just assumed that when you went home with a guy, you fucked him and then he fucked you, but apparently that is rarely if ever the case. One of the TV screens was showcasing a gay guy tossing another guy's salad, and we began discussing the finer aspects of such activity [ed note: tossing salad means to eat out someone's asshole]. I shemale forum that I had never eaten out a girl's ass, but that I had had girls do it to me, and that yes, I liked it, especially when the girl jacked me off as she was doing it.

They started telling me all these trade secrets about tossing salad and the various ways that one could improve it.

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